Jealousy & the Actor: Converting Envy into Action

Jun 21

You just heard from a friend that they booked a recurring role on a Netflix series. "Fantastic!" you say, but inside, it stings. Why them? Why not me? Why didn’t I even get an audition? Actors’ jealousy hits all of us at some point, but how do you deal with envy without letting it spiral?

Let’s start by breaking it down. As actors, we’re constantly comparing ourselves to others—especially when social media only shows the wins. The roles booked, the callbacks, the on-set selfies. What we don’t see are the rejections, struggles, or waiting that come with it. Comparing your journey to someone else’s highlight reel can lead to acting jealousy and frustration.

But here’s the thing: career envy doesn’t have to hold you back. Instead of focusing on what someone else has, ask yourself what steps you can take to create your own opportunities. Overcoming jealousy as an actor starts with turning that energy into action.

For example, if another actor’s success has you feeling envious, use it as inspiration. Reverse engineer their journey—what moves did they make to get where they are? Did they network, create their own project, or take a risk that paid off? Instead of wishing you were in their shoes, figure out what you can do to take steps toward your goals. Of course you'll get rejections, but you'll also get opportunities. Never overlook the power of taking action over wishing.

LinkedIn, for instance, is an excellent platform to connect with industry executives. Of course, you may face rejection, but consider it a numbers game. Success begins to happen when you have systems in place and you work them consistently. As my dad used to say, "If you chop wood, chips fly" — which I always took to mean that hard work pays off in the end.

Also, don't just rely on your agent to make take action on your behalf. Take the initiative to make connections yourself and make things happen. As actors, you need a platform to assert your values. It doesn't really matter what they are. Your cause could range from advocating for diversity, supporting LGBTQ+ rights, or even sharing your love for your pet. The key is to stand for something you believe in and let people know. This helps you to stand out and gives you a talking point when meeting new people.

Let's tackle jealousy again. When professional jealousy strikes, it’s a sign that you care deeply about your career. Use that as motivation. Reach out to industry professionals, produce a short film, and most importantly, get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Taking action gives you confidence. And the more you step out of your comfort zone, the more your boundaries will expand, which leads to personal growth and confidence.

Confidence comes from doing the work consistently. Researching projects, identifying people you'd like to work with, and reaching out to them. Today's digital world provides us a myriad of opportunities to connect with professionals we'd love to work with, which was unheard of two decades ago.

So, when jealousy strikes, breakdown your feelings. Ask yourself why you're jealous. Is it because of the other actor's success? Or is it because you wish to be as successful? If so, then convert your envy into action. Instead of complaining about your lack of opportunities, ask yourself what you can do to attain similar success. Use jealousy as a roadmap to navigate towards what you desire.

I'm going to wrap this up by saying, it's essential not to see yourself as a victim but a doer in control of your journey. At the end of the day, your journey is yours. Don’t let jealousy in your acting career turn into a roadblock. Focus on what you can control, take action, and keep moving forward. There’s no room for the green-eyed monster when you’re busy building the career you want.

And, if you’re a trained actor, serious about your career but struggling to get to the next level, then book an appointment with me. It’s free, and together we can figure out if you’re a good fit for my program, and if you’re not, we’ll figure out the next best steps for your journey together.

Until next time, you stay your bold and beautiful self.

Anne

BTW, if you’re ready to take action then watch this video on how to turn small actions into big wins.

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